Writer, blocked.

I don't know how to say what's on my mind right now. And it probably doesn't belong on a blog, for that matter. But the beauty of a blog is that very few people appreciate them enough to read them. So I get the thrill of putting my thoughts out to the public without really attracting too many readers.

I've been listening to The Gaslight Anthem quite a bit lately, and somehow, this music helps me put my thoughts in order.

I've never had music I could really call my own. It was Billy Joel and Mom's 80's-90's-and-now radio station until I switched to the pop-music-of-the-moment station. And when I came to college, I started loving Country music. Somehow the relative obscurity of Gaslight makes it feel like this is my music.

It's actually the first music I've loved with a hint of angst to it, and that's been pretty healing. To be honest, that dose of life-bites-sometimes is about 6 years overdue. Two or three lines from one of these songs hit so startlingly close to my reality I had to listen to it ten more times.

"I saw tail lights last night, in a dream about my whole life.
Everybody leaves, so why, why wouldn't you?"

I'm not entirely comfortable talking about the tough spots in my life. Pity makes me uncomfortable. But it's a relief to know someone, or some band, has had the same experiences I have.

It may not even be the music that's helping me, though. The most meaningful music takes a person away from the here and now to a better there and then. And in this case, this music takes me from my muddled thoughts to remind me of the great new friends I've made who feel as strongly about this band as I do. I know I could go to that handful of people for anything, and that's a real comfort.

"But all I want is for you to be alright and satisfied
Brothers and sisters know that anytime or late at night,
If you call I will answer, I'm open ears though tired eyes
But the world closed it's arms on us now."